Sunday, August 30, 2009

When reality hits you...

Do any of you ever wake up and get "dolled up" and feel pretty/amazing/beautiful/just "ta-da". You are ready to "conquer the day". Only later to see a picture of yourself and have your whole world come shattering down around you? Well, I had just that this weekend.

I have always been big, heavy, fat...always, since I can remember. But, I have always "carried it well" or so I/everyone else have told me/myself. I have let this "lie" convince me that I am big and fat but that I am not as big and fat as I really am...does that make sense?

Well, today was my best friend's wedding. I searched and searched for a dress. I bought one on eBay, and HATED it. My hips looked huge...not flattering...wrong color...etc. So I found another one at Lane Bryant and was "settling" with it. At 8:00 am Saturday my best friend, her maid of honor and I went and got our hair done and got all "dolled up". I thought I looked beautiful. I went to the wedding, the morning/early afternoon part. My husband took pictures...then we came home in between before the night time ring ceremony and this is what I found on our camera!!!

I was shattered! I look huge...which means I AM HUGE! More huge than I even realized! More huge than I imagined. I was devastated. What's worse is that NO ONE, not ONE person let me know who AWFUL and UNFLATTERING that dress was.

So...this is a wake up call...butt in gear!~


R and R said...

I have to comment on this one. You ARE beautiful my dear!! True beauty has nothing to do with numbers you see on a scale. This is something I have struggled with my entire life! Beauty comes from within and you are radiant! Sometimes our bodies hold us back from realizing how truly beautiful we really are. I hope this journey helps you see and feel that!

Miss Madison's Mommy said...

I feel for you because this happens to me all the time. I had a baby and no one told me how HUGE I had gotten! I look terrible in every picture! It's really starting to affect me and my life so I'm doing weight watchers too. Good luck to you!!! Love your blog!