Saturday, August 2, 2014

August 1st starting over

How many times is too many to fail? Or to start over? How many times have I asked that SAME question on here before? And yet here I am yet again. I guess I should count it a victory because I AM here, rather than in a pint of ice cream, or wallowing in more pity gaining more pounds. But, alas, it's hard to see it that way.

This year was/is supposed to be about loving me. About finding me. About accepting me. About letting me be me. About getting all aspects of life. Here we are in August and I would say I have made some progress, but not enough.  SO, what am I going to do about it?'s my plan for the next few months...

Continue therapy, well find a new therapist, again. It seems every time I find a therapist and get somewhere, something changes, moves, they leave, something.  Well, no more excuses, gotta get back again. I was making progress again. For the sake of me, my husband, my marriage, my family, I NEED this.

TRACK, TRACK, TRACK my food. Am I perfect? NOPE, not even close. In fact most would say I don't even eat very healthy. But, I can't fix it all at once. So I am still focusing on staying UNDER my calories for right now, and will continue that until September 1st. Then On September 1st I will work on cleaning it up more. Does this mean I can eat an entire pan of brownies? NO! But, it does mean I may eat brownies.  Be kind to myself, is my motto on food right now, but track it even if I am not.

Continue drinking my water.

Wear my new, nifty body bugg. And MOVE. I physically CAN'T do much. but right now I'm not doing anything, so anything is an improvement. I recently was given some resistance bands. So I am excited to try those out. 

Blog more. I find writing things down, and being accountable helps, even not a single sole reads this, which I don't think they do. It's more a journal.

And finally, continue doing some research on weight loss surgery. I have done a lot of the pre-reqs on it and think I may end up going that route just because of how bad my health is (diabetes, fibromyalgia, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, migraines, IBS, knee pain/surgeries, etc) And I have 3 drs all pushing for it, and my insurance will cover it once I lose 10 more lbs, but I want to make 100% sure I am ready for that.

On the plus size I am down almost 20 lbs still since Jan, so I am taking that as a victory and I am accepting it as a positive.